Help for Facing Death
More Than Meets the Eye: True Stories about Death, Dying and Afterlife is a book that address topics that many people are not comfortable talking about such as suicide, the near-death experience, end of life decisions, and euthanasia. The book is designed to help people release their fear of death, learn to communicate with those on the other side, and to comfort someone who is grieving the loss of a loved one.
Discuss Death with Others
Talking about death is one of the most difficult subjects for some people. However, discussing death, dying, and end-of-life decisions is a very important thing for families to do before there is a crisis. During the emotional upheaval that the death process creates is not the ideal time to talk about the dying patient’s wishes. Not having an advance healthcare directive that clearly states what life-saving measures a person desires puts undue pressure on loved ones. The family and friends of the dying are forced to make decisions about life support and body disposal. It helps to know what the loved one would have wanted. More Than Meets The Eye contains an advance healthcare directive that can be signed and notarized in the presence of two witnesses to help making end-of-life decisions less painful.
A person’s death affects us to some degree whether we are family, friends, or professional caregivers. If you’ve ever attended the bedside of a terminally ill patient, you know that it is draining on the entire family. The process may force painful decisions, domestic challenges, or shifts in responsibilities. It may cause us to forfeit our social life or isolate from friends.
We may experience any number of emotions after the loved one passes. We may feel anger toward God or another person, (as in the case of homicide), whom we feel caused the death. Our anger may be toward our loved one for dying. We may feel guilty that we did not show enough love or that we didn’t do enough for them. We may blame ourselves for their death. We may even feel jealous that others still have their loved one and we do not. At times we may be in denial and expect, at any moment, to physically hear or see our loved one again. These are normal responses and part of the grieving process.
Critically ill patients may experience physical pain from their disease or injury, but they may also experience psychological pain as they become increasingly dependent and weak. They may be concerned about their children and how they will cope or how they will be cared for. They may worry about how the family will pay for medical and funeral expenses. They may also be dealing with their concerns about the life they have lived. They may experience guilt or a need for forgiveness in a relationship, or perhaps the need to reconcile with someone or say “thank you” or “good-bye.”
The dying process creates serious questions that cannot be avoided.
Many who have gone through their lives unconcerned about spiritual issues may worry about what is to come in the Afterlife. Facing these questions may cause them to challenge beliefs they previously held. Without being physically or emotionally able to talk through such things, the patient may experience depression, anxiety, insecurity, helplessness, and fear.
Family members may have similar concerns as they face the impending loss. They may feel that they have failed in some way. They may be reminded of a previous loss or they may be facing their own fear of dying. Due to cultural or religious beliefs, some families find it hard to talk about spiritual, personal, or emotional issues. This only makes the process of letting go more difficult.
Family members are not the only ones who deal intimately with death. Medical staff and caretakers are also deeply affected by the death of a patient—perhaps not to the same degree as the family, but it certainly leaves its mark. Nurses who see a patient day after day form a bond with them and their family. A doctor may feel compelled to display a “stiff upper lip” and announce to the family that their loved one has passed. Regardless of how “in control” of their emotions they may seem, many healthcare givers are deeply affected by the loss of their patients.
Author Yvonne Perry is a volunteer for Alive Hospice where she ministers by singing light language into her frame drum. She able to help you understand how deceased loved ones communicate with us from the other side of life. Contact her about coaching now.
The audio book is three hours long and has beautiful music between chapters to make listening a pleasure. Listen to a sample of this audio by clicking the arrow in the player below . . .
Download the audio book of More Than Meets the Eye ~ True Stories about Death, Dying, and Afterlife